The Long And Winding Neural Pathway

‘Hoppípolla’ : Icelandic for “Jumping Into Puddles”.




The trip into 5D is not for the faint hearted. To say it has been a roller coaster over the years is an understatement. One week I walk into Bluebell Valley and then the next week it is Death Valley. Last week I attended if that’s possible, an online funeral on my PC. Firstly it was weird with restrictions on numbers allowed to attend the service, not being able to go in person but watching it online from a distance and then seeing the attendees wearing masks was totally bizarre.

My friend had the ‘I have only slipped into the next room’ poem by Henry Scott Holland read but death even if it’s not real can be used by Spirit for its own purposes as you realise the depth of the feeling that you have, which doesn’t show itself normally in day to day life and in extremis you find yourself going deep into your feelings. In a sense this reality is designed to limit our emotional Self.


Death is nothing at all.
It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.

Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you,
And the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.

Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?

Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval,
somewhere very near,
just round the corner.

All is well.
Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.
One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!


To say what we’ve experienced on Merovee and surrounding areas over the years has been phenomenal, again is an understatement. Some of the experiences myself and others I know have experienced have been totally mind blowing.




Reality would seem to be totally different from what 3D vision shows. As Christof said : ‘We accept the reality of the world with which we are presented’. Until you don’t.

The Universe is saying it’s ‘Back to the Garden’ time but even Back to the Garden can get confusing. In my first trip into the Bluebell field I came across the most incredible and beautiful scene and within it there was ‘A Den’ which I read as Eden.



And the Quantum World and maybe Quantum Edens. It’s now May. May Be and ‘It’s Possible’.

This morning I went Walkabout again and ended up in another mind blowing and ‘A Place Beyond Belief’ bluebell field.






And in Another Bluebell field there was ‘Another A Den’.




As we’ve come to learn the Universe speaks in strange ways at times.

East Cottage and West Cottage.



And Quantum Trees falling in a forest down a neural pathway.

‘If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?’.





Back To The Gardens !


108 thoughts on “The Long And Winding Neural Pathway

  1. Frank,

    I’m right with you…..

    I’ve been on this mission to “get out” in a straight line, BE the “Victory Rose”….

    And I’m circling back again.

    The “fear” of death is not fear of DEATH…..

    It’s the fear of never seeing the one you love again.

    1. I was sitting on my back deck listening to the I’d call it, “angelic” sound of the bird I thought I may have to leave here and go seek: the hermit thrush. Vermont’s state bird….

      But hey….. it’s right here. In my backyard.

      So so beautiful sounding at sunset.

      And then I watched as I saw a bird? no, a winged black thing detach from a branch above me….. ah, a bat!…. good, they’re “good”…..

      And it flew off into its nightly errands, assigned to it by our Creator….

      And the sight of it made me feel good….

      Then I came here…..

      To post.

      As I cried about maybe never seeing my Mike again…..

      1. So Frank I agree it’s a rollercoaster all right…..

        Have to point out that this is where AA gets it wrong, these counting of days and getting a medal for the more and more days you go sober, when it’s really an ascending spiral of … up to the glorious sunlight…. and then dipping back into the shit (because you just can’t sustain that high)…

        and back up….?

        and then back down again….

        over and over again.


        I’m thinking our SOURCE (the Father, Yah) wants to get us so DISCOMBOBULATED, to the point of…. our BREAKDOWN.


        The PLACE in which He can finally BREAK THROUGH to us.


                1. WHOSE “bride”?

                  Now that is the question, isn’t it?

                  I told you all, may the best man win.


                  Or the "man" who has the cojones to knock on my door….


                    1. Apollyon, thank you for stepping up to explain something I should already know. I TESTIFY that I will not be so stupid again. How the heck could I not know about cojones?(It does sound like a Texas word) 🤔
                      I have great respect for man parts and such. Umm, yep.

                      See? You sign ’em. and everybody has more freedom!

                    2. This is a how-to on signing your man’s penis. It’s freedom for everybody!
                      I like to write “thinking about you xo”, or “Mamma’s property”, or sometimes, just “I love you”. I want him to know I’m thinking about him when he goes out to play poker or whatever. 🙂

                    1. geneofisis

                      “Cojones ?! Wtf is that?!

                      Why would you want to be a bride?!

                      Just ‘be’.
                      You can’t go wrong.”

                      Well yeah, wtf are “cojones”?

                      I’ve never come across them, personally…. lol

                      I think a male-born child becomes a MAN (not that I’ve ever met one) when he matures and grows the balls to fight Satan “to the death” to capture his female “mate,” his “wife,” his “Womb-man.”….

                      And on bended knee “propose” to her…. risking being shot down.

                      If he never faces the battle to the death to get his “woman,” he will never have one, nor will he ever become a real “man.” He will remain Peter Pan, the boy who never grew up, until his death.

                      And, for me?

                      It’s kinda lonely, just BE-ing….


                      When you fall in love with welp, yeah, a “boy,” when you look into their eyes and see their love for you and their wanting you….and feel their trying to protect you from all the hyenas snarling at your ass, disrespecting you, calling you a dog, saying you’re just “white trash”….. sending you death threats CONSTANTLY….. retrieving a mangled deep blue-sea colored item of clothing from the conveyor belt and “good” -naturedly saying “You’re back in business, young lady!” ….i.e. just a whore out to STEAL another man from his “wife” (ahem…or rather, his “controller” his… “lover”)

                      when a young MAN tries to protect you from being so abused, you fall in love with them ….

                      And you don’t want to cave and chase them because you know now that always backfires….No, you want them to COME GET you!

                      Jus sayin!

                      You long to be near them again…..

                      And it’s not LUST, which is different.

                      I just long to be near him and to have him next to me, looking out for me, “Care-ing” for me.

                      So I could “care” for him too….

                      It’s called “True Love”?

                      Christ-like LOVE….

                      Why I can’t have that in this life or am constantly blocked from it I know not.

                      So yeah, my “consolation prize” is probably, no, actually the “Crown of Everlasting Life”…..

                      to “give up” the “fairy-tale” Prince Charming fantasy ….

                      “give up” my addiction to a lie…..

                      and therefore be awarded the true Crown of Life:

                      to be granted the title of “Bride” of Christ: your ONLY “true love,” and you didn’t even know it.

                      To BE….”crowned”

                      One with All that IS


                  1. I don’t want you to be lonely, Trinity. You are FIRE⚡️and somebody should appreciate you, as you would like ❤️

                    1. Sometimes I get frustrated and have no outlet and I am careless with words. Please forgive 🙏🏻

                    2. The mafia would not be an ideal place for anything. 😳
                      You have to get away from that. It’s toxic.

        1. Trinity

          I have mixed views of AA. My father found AA helpful but I think he went to AA meetings more for company and a chat which I suppose is helpful in itself. I think saying ‘I am a name’ and ‘I am an alcoholic’ is not the truth. A name is part of the persona we create and ‘I am an alcoholic’ is another label. But it does seem to help some. Horses for courses. In the bigger picture we have all sorts of special relationships and alcohol addiction is just another one. A substitute for and defence against the love of god. There is only one problem and one answer to everything and that is ending the separation with God. IMO.

          I am still positive with this. I see it every day in my life we are going somewhere good but it is tough medicine. God is here and God is real.

          I wasn’t very keen on The Mission movie as in my view it glossed over the European invasion of the Americas and its effect on the native population but I do like the music !

          1. Frank,

            Yes, thank you for pointing out that it would be better to say that AA “gets it wrong” for ME. “Horses for courses,” so AA can help “you,” if it’s the right “course” for you.

            I guess for ME the “counting of days” just keeps me hooked in the fight against the alco-ghoul, and it attacks me in other ways (insults from coworkers that I’m still just a DUI Pyle no matter HOW MANY DAYS I go sober…. incredibly sore joints called “arthritis” so I don’t want to jog or do what I know would be healing exercise…. I’ve read that the way to “cure” arthritis is simply yes, STAY SOBER, ie on the alcohol and “junk” food cleanse, do cleansing fasting like green smoothies, and WORK THROUGH THE PAIN to push the built-up toxins in your joints OUT with fresh air and your heart pumping freshly oxygenated blood through your body and joints to heal them and CLEAR THEM from all the junk that’s built up in them from over drinking and over eating “dead” food.

            So hey, God KNOWS you WILL fall, but the Creator doesn’t let you lie there prostrate … the Creator will pick you up again….

            For another “go round.”

            No judgment, only PURE LOVE.

      1. Yes, “fear of death” = fear of SEPARATION from your loved ones.

        We agree on that.


        1. Trinity, that is the only thing I fear. I will not be separated from the ones I love. (we probably agree on more things 😉). You’re just more expressive than me.

    1. Frank, I’m having a time with a neighborhood kid named Cameron. His mom doesn’t want him to be around Cash. 🙄
      I have no idea. Except that I think it’s stupid. When you start dividing neighborhood kids, it crosses a line and I say no.
      And about the bride stuff, of course I love a sacred marriage. I am just expressing emotion about everything ✨
      In the garden, “marriage” isn’t a word…it “is”.

      1. The neighborhood kids: Cameron, cash, trey, Dylan, Hayden, Aiden, Liam, Ben. And Ava ☺️
        And of course, Charlie⚡️
        These kids are driving me nuts!
        High maintenance!
        (rant over). I love them.

      2. With boys of that age you’re going to get high energy !

        For whatever reason Cam is in the mix. Jenny and I have our mystery with Old Blue Eyes and Cam and there is more which I won’t go into here.

        Also I wondered about the connection with Cam with the online funeral and the Observer effect.

        And mirrors again. I rewatched Cam recently. In the movie the main character is called Alice and she lives in Wonderland Drive.

        This was a snapshot from the movie.

        1. “I want my face back!”

          Mirrors and fractals. I don’t know what it is, but there is something called onlyfans. There was an uproar when Disney star Bella Thorne decided to be on onlyfans and the ‘regulars’ were upset because its not a place for famous people. Its for, you know, ‘everyday’ porn (“stars”)? …

          “Bella Thorne made promises and didn’t deliver, and that makes sex workers look bad,” Michelle says. “She’s making us look like we don’t care about our fans, or are liars and cheats. The price cap didn’t affect my business — however, that doesn’t make me any less pissed off about the cap. I’m very upset for my friends” — other content creators suffering as a result.”

          The trailer for that movie CAM made me think of the onlyfans news story.
          And the Cam in my neighborhood seems to have strict parents. He goes to a Christian school. He also has strange vibes, like he has “shame”. He is polite, but doesn’t look you in the eye. He isn’t doing anything obnoxious, but I saw Ben asking for “space” when Cameron sat next to him.
          It’s the mask. What is the boundary? The glass bead.

          The glass bead is made from sand. You melt (ALL OF THE TINY PARTS OF EVERYTHING, aka sand, or S-DNA) and form it into a perfect and clear-as-a-crystal orb, as a representation of truth… Mirrors and fractals upon fractals all around, which are each and every one’s perspective in perfect sync. It erases all notions of karma and stuff. There’s no way to NOT see the beautiful truth. That painting is called Salvator Mundi, ‘Saviour of the World’.

          1. ‘Only Fans’ rings of the Cam movie looking at the article. About ‘Online’. One of the things I’ve come across in the last year is that is very difficult to actually contact a human being in large organisations and I get the feeling it’s a bot speaking back at me even when I actually get to speak to someone on the phone or in email. Maybe we’re just seeing what was always there.

            About Cameron. I do have sympathy. It’s not easy for the awkward kid but sounds like he has an energy which Ben is uncomfortable with.

    2. I stayed up all night trying to make a class project for Charlie a crazy level of perfect. Guess what it was…a robot,
      Charlie named it Roy Bott 😂

      It’s a platform thing with legos and tripod upon red blue and green markers (hence the name Roy G Bot) and when you turn it on the motor makes the makers “draw”.

        1. Apollyon, Charlie was particularly agitated about this project, and me too. But he kept saying “what is the point?!”

          (The project was to make a robot with things around the house, and the robot has to have a purpose.)

          And I answered, “I don’t know. I’m just trying to help.”
          After several times of his question, “what is the point?”, I said,
          Maybe the point is to see that if you make something to do a task that you don’t want to do, then you have to have a good enough reason to take yourself away from part of the “thing”, which you are a part of.

          (of course, he did not respond and he did not hear what I was saying).

          According to hisssstory, the “fertile crescent” is where our salvation started (even though everybody was fine for tens of thousands of years before the dude Abraham got a bee in his bonnet).

          Since we “domesticated” (her), animals, we could finally fucking THINK about shit and make robots to do things we don’t want to do, and then think about hedge funds, insurance, usury, profits, and telling women to shut up and get in the kitchen. FINALLY! Because before that, everybody was (more than fine). 🙄 Thank GOD for god. How did anybody even exist in perfect harmony before that train wreck of an unholy hot mess of bullshit came down from heaven to help us poor hue-mans. There we were, just perfectly fine but God said ‘we gotta remix this’ and he started turning people into salt pillars, raping everybody, testing people with bullshit ideas, …literally making hell on earth.

          Welp, I say enuff of that bs. And you can bet your cojones on that. ⚡️

          1. (for some people anyway) It’s tough to make that jump from not-knowing to knowing. As I read about you constructing the marker toting robot, I couldn’t help but think of my own father “helping me” build a science project when I was 12 and in 6th grade. An electric motor that turned a cork balanced on top of a drinking straw sitting atop of a nail, and the cork turned via bare wires connected to a model train transformer. Basically, the idea was his, all the components were his, he did everything, and I just kinda sat there thinking, ironically, “what’s the point”?

            In theory, “the point” was to demonstrate how “invisible” electrical fields can influence certain other objects in space. But at the time, I didn’t give a shit about any of it because I was ancillary in the process, and was mainly only worried about not getting yet another “F” for an assignment. (which, I honestly didn’t care about that either because I was already making straight F’s and had been since grade 4) But, my parents, and especially my father DID care, so, he expended the time and effort to help his dumb as a bag of hammers son along in this case.

            In retrospect, I see that event as kindof a long-term investment. A single piece of gravel in the aggregate of the cement of some unfinished roadway under construction, yet I did not see it at the time because I was too young and inexperienced and prolly also too dejected and bitter to realize what exactly what transpiring at that moment in time.

            All that to say maybe, just hang in there and keep plugging away. Your son is hanging in there too, even tho he doesn’t have much of a choice in the matter, but yeah hang in there if for no other reason that he’s hanging in there too. Not every play is a touchdown and not every swat of the bat is a home run. Most plays and movements are just the grind of getting oneself positioned where one needs to be in order to reach that critical mass. The tactical stuff which makes the strategic stuff possible.

            All that to say, maybe your son is just, in this instance, having a little difficulty understanding the dynamics, and you are having difficulty explaining them. These are fucking phenomenal moments in time for both teacher and student to learn something. 😉

            As to all the mystical stuff, I really don’t know. I’ve heard a lot of tales, much of it rings bells, but as to their truth I personally don’t know. We’re here more than there, and it’s more now than then, so for me personally its contextually confusing to correlate the two. I don’t believe, and I don’t disbelieve…just, is is. Was was, is is, and whatthefuckeverwillbe is whatthefuckeverwillbe. lolz

            I have no doubt that was was. How that relates to here and now tho?
            Mystery = UNSOLVED! Investigations are ongoing.

            1. Apollyon, thank you for that. I’m copying and pasting that beautiful comet because its so eloquently written and the message is wonderful. It was a needed dose of kindness for me. And, it is correct.
              I am often getting frustrated with the words and communication because for me, everything feels too tedious. Boring, repetition is so…BORING! It’s not living. The whole ‘thing’ doesn’t stick because the temperance isn’t right. Survival mode doesn’t work anymore because if you don’t care if you die, or, maybe consciousness is realizing a broader perspective and we are life in a coat of death (or something), so, the “fire” needs to be directed (that’s how I feel personally, anyway). And when it comes to Charlie, of course he doesn’t see my world-weary side; I do my best to encourage him, because he is a shining star and I love him so much I can’t contain it! I think he was born smarter than I was; he seems to already know things that I didn’t know at his age.
              I think the way I feel, is that we are so beyond the mundane ideas about existence and how to exist as a society, and there’s a clinging on to some of these old ways that just aren’t relevant anymore. My aversion to these old notions are perceived as reckless, and it might manifest as ‘those not wearing a mask are a threat’, as the border and boundary, object/subject is blurry. There is mystery as to how this works, but we simply are not hypnotized anymore.

              A plane just flew into a skyscraper?

              A lone shooter just killed dozens from a hotel in Vegas during a music festival?

              There’s a pandemic that’s going to kill everybody and you need to wear two masks and get lots of vaccines made by a computer dude?


              And then you get to the point where you can’t stand to see your kid being drilled with so much left-brain focus, so he can get into college, so he can get a job, so he can make money for food, and have his own kid, to do the same damn thing…that’s not living!

              We need a new concoction. A good place to start is to make use of the ‘technology’, and let go of ‘learning to do it the hard way’ because why? Use the calculator and why spend hours doing long division? If disaster strikes and we can’t (depend on our devices) who the f*ck is sitting around doing long division anyway?
              (the words are self-explanatory…LONG DIVISION). Let’s do immediate union.

  2. Maybe we’re in the flood and what “is” will be when we figure it out. Or, what our mind works out. We aren’t our mind, but I guess there this “whatever “ physical stuff, so…wake me up when you’ve got it figout I’m tired!

    1. MJ

      The birth day seems very important. I was born in a house called Gateways. On my walkabout yesterday I came across a house called Gateways in Nutfield. Nothing around here seems to have any solidity to it.

      Also a house called The Sentinel which was the name of the original short story for 2001 : A Space Odyssey by Arthur C Clarke.

      1. Frank, of course you were born in Gateways.
        My mom is Rh neg. I’m O pos. I was a “risk”. She said I was a “hard pregnancy”.
        If alien lady has monkey child, I guess so! 😂

        1. Before I found Gateways in Nutfield I had been in Holborns Established 1974 🤔. Any remains of 3D reality has spectacularly collapsed here.

          The other thing is I have x2 different birth certs. Quantum Sally Fields are confusing and also scary at times but it keeps on saying they are real. Yesterday I noticed I had my two main hoodies lying over the chair in my bedroom which I put my clothes on.

      1. I love that song. IDK why but something tragic about people and those music festivals.

    1. Should Bruce Wayne have discerned the trickery of “Raz Aghul” at the “beginning” and not have “obeyed” and picked the blue flower to gain entrance into the “secret society” of the League of Shadows?

      Ah, no!

      He did not “make a mistake.”

      He “went with it” and thus got to know his true enemy: Satan, as well as his tactics, most of all, of “theatricality.”


      Wearing a “mask.”

      Know your enemy.

      Only THEN can you defeat him.

      1. I want a man….
        I can completely trust.

        I want a man….
        who doesn’t hide things from me.

        I want a man….
        who doesn’t make war with his extended family in MY name.

        I want a MAN, period.

        After 20 years here, under your term as “sheriff,” you have fulfilled NONE of my “preferences.”

        I DON”T WANT YOU
        I DON”T FEAR YOU






      1. Can’t sell my house cuz there’s “something wrong” with it?

        Ahh. Not much longer.

        The burn ban is over in the next couple weeks.

        I’m gonna give this “Guy,” this hero?

        A Viking funeral pyre in flames.

        A HERO”S BURIAL.

        He and his family deserve it.

        You see the smoke, you are welcome to drop by, no questions asked, and pay your respects to your loved one.


      Here I am.

      You rapists and below-the-radar thugs and shitheads….

      Umm, yeah.

      Enjoy me being ME…..

      all over your ass…. I’m the RAM don’t forget.

      1. I always liked that one better than the Rooney Mara Daniel Craig one. But I like that one, too. It’s no coincidence the baddie is Stellan Skarsgard.

        That family is wacko. The son, Alexander, is the star of True Blood (a bloodthirsty vamp, made to look sexy and normal), and Big Lies, a wife-abusing sicko.
        The other son Bill Skarsgard, is the star of the remake of IT.

          1. Yikes, thanks MJ.

            “Stellan Skarsgaard”

            I kinda knew there was something off when I also came across his son portraying “It.”

            They got that “northern” white devil thing goin on….

            All white = scary inbred mf’s

      2. So I have a job at the “Apple” bees all around….

        I finally caught your lies from your “girl” whose name means “grace” uh, yeah

        When I was hired, I was told there are runners and bussers, period.

        “Nancy Grace” tells me don’t get used to it, you’ll have to do your own running and bussing during the week.

        Michelle goes, “Whaaat?”

        So um…..

        I’m coming in and I’m going to work this job the way it is supposed to be offered to me….. NOT from “JD”




        NOT YOU.

  3. Surfacing. Parts of an ancient upheaval.

    Ophiolite literally means snakestone. 🐍
    Since scientists have never drilled deep enough into the earth to observe the mantle (the region of the earth’s interior between the crust and core), ophiolites are important because they are places where geologists can observe large sections of earth’s mantle directly. They normally appear on the ocean floor. Here they are now observable on land.

    Disclose your energy. 🛸

    1. In the Gardens. Damn talking snake !

      By coinkydink Pan’s Labyrinth has been playing around my head the last few days. Beautiful movie. And Ofelia .

    1. All Mike had to do was to stand beside me.

      Male + Female Warriors – Activated


      I don’t know where he is or what he is doing…..

      He’s my man.

      It’s a weird thing to say, since I don’t even know him either.

      But we had our moment.

      And it was enough.

            1. Mike!

              I’ve always hated the games we play. Also noted that my “honesty” doesn’t win me any um……guys. Or anything. Just not “cool.”

              Oh well.

              I wish we got to know each other a little bit. I’ve got this waitress job but to be honest, they all have to be in your business, they have to know it all……

              Not me.

              I miss you. I thought you would come for me if I left.


              Aren’t I as irresistible to you as you are to me?

              I mean, c’mon!


              1. I need to say goodbye tonight.

                I won’t survive otherwise.

                I need to move on.

                Goodbye, Mike, and thank you.


  4. To all (Mike, Butch, um idk whoever…..)

    I’m not a fool.

    Just wanted to say that, and of course I know “Mike” is no saint.

    Like I said…..

    May the best MAN win.

    In the MEAN time…..

    I’m GONE.

    1. And I just have to say for the record, how much I HATE my ex…..

      for ABANDONING not just me, but our son.

      I HATE YOU.

      I PRAY YOU …. blech.

      It’s not worth the fiery brimstone I hate you so much.

      You’re… pathetic.

      Go and kill yourself …..

      I don’t CARE. (Oh, but DO take CARE of your NEW family! YOUR NEW SON AND DAUGHTER……)

      FUCK YOU


        (Oh she can’t have that family portrait of you two with John, no my Brennan won’t like that….)

        FUUUCK YOU!

      2. My ex is clueless.

        And my effort to keep us a “happy family” and forgive….

        is probably WHY I’ve lost my son.

        My son thinks I’m crazy.

        My son has rejected me.

        My son hates me.

        He’s “all I have.”


        I’m …..


          1. That schmuck called my son’s “father” paid ME no child support.

            I’m quite acquanted with men who are not men…

            Oh, I didn’t “need” it?

            You’re such a SCHMUCK.

            WHY does your son lack as YOU COMMENTED “self-confidence”?

            Because HIS FATHER IS A LOSER.

            That’s why, you fucking piece of shit.

            1. So I’ve done my duty.

              I’m GONE

              I love my son more than myself.

              Maybe that’s my problem.

                  1. And I am now going to throw out every picture I have of you and John, and me.

                    You don’t deserve ANY PLACE in his life history (he doesn’t want to see it anyway) as “his father.”

                    You’re a NON.

                    Stands for “non-existent.”

                    My son grew up fatherless.

                    And it’s time I accepted it.

                    1. “Love” and “Hate” are really the same thing, in my opinion….

                    2. But hey, that was AFTER I wanted to be a pilot.


                      Ain’t life grand?

                      I mean, really….

                      Look at what my life would’ve become had I GONE the “pilot” route….

                      DEAD END

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